I welcome anything that makes me chuckle.
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and for the people that don't do social media or facebook or twit or tweet?????? my phone makes and takes calls,nothing else

Social media are available on good old fashioned computers too... it's not necessary to have a smart phone to participate in the mediocrity - just head on over to https://twitter.com/explore or https://en-gb.facebook.com/ or similar and off you go

Steve

Do I really need them???????

Well, no, of course you don't! And the point I was making earlier is that we don't really need the unfunny internet memes that they generate replacing 'proper' jokes here on this thread either


But, more importantly, does anyone remember the post I did here concerning my spine? It was about a week back!

Steve.

Hope this doesn't offend anyone

Angie and Steve what you find funny is great for you but we don't all have the same funny bone. Why not let people enjoy what they like? Written humour isn't in some way superior. Especially certain bad jokes.

Me too, should have done that one for April 1st
Dave

and me

I'm normally a social girl

I love to meet my mates

But lately with the virus here

We can't go out the gates.

You see, we are the 'oldies' now

We need to stay inside

If they haven't seen us for a while

They'll think we've upped and died.

They'll never know the things we did

Before we got this old

There wasn't any Facebook

So not everything was told.

We may seem sweet old ladies

Who would never be uncouth

But we grew up in the 60s -

If you only knew the truth!

There was sex and drugs and rock 'n roll

The pill and miniskirts

We smoked, we drank, we partied

And were quite outrageous flirts.

Then we settled down, got married

And turned into someone's mum,

Somebody's wife, then nana,

Who on earth did we become?

We didn't mind the change of pace

Because our lives were full

But to bury us before we're dead

Is like a red rag to a bull!

So here you find me stuck inside

For 4 weeks, maybe more

I finally found myself again

Then I had to close the door!

It didnt really bother me

I'd while away the hour

I'd bake for all the family

But I've got no flaming flour!

Now Netflix is just wonderful

I like a gutsy thriller

I'm swooning over Idris

Or some random sexy killer.

At least I've got a stash of booze

For when I'm being idle

There's wine and whiskey, even gin

If I'm feeling suicidal!

So let's all drink to lockdown

To recovery and health

And hope this awful virus

Doesn't decimate our wealth.

We'll all get through the crisis

And be back to join our mates

Just hoping I'm not far too wide

To fit through the flaming gates!

Dave

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Oops 😂

Shared from the best ever vets in Mochdre, Wales

Last time I posted what I thought was a funny seemed to offended someone so if this one does I’m sorry so just wipe it off. Here goes:-

I was in the pub and overheard our postman bragging that he had made love to every women in our 14 house cul de sac - bar one!!
I came home and told the wife what I’d heard. She replied, “It must be that stuck up bitch in number 12!!”

Again if I’ve offended anyone please remove.